Tonight I was able to watch last night’s Jon & Kate plus 8 (thanks to my DVR) , I have commented on them before here if you would like to see the context in which I am writing this.
I saw something I found to be intriguing while watching the show, and it was not just in the last episode but I have seen it over and over again even slowly before the demise of Jon & Kate’s marriage. They are getting their kitchen remodeled, and Jon says that they are doing this for the kids. I find it interesting that in the midst of their separation they are getting their kitchen remodeled when I have slowly seen the remodeling and eroding of their lives. But Jon mentions that the reason they are doing this is for the kids? It’s not that I don’t believe what he says; with a family of 8 kids more cabinet space can be argued for, and although it may not be necessary they are well within the means to do it… especially because it is probably free. But I have heard them use this statement over and over again, ”we are doing this for the kid’s”. In fact Kate takes the kids to the beach and I heard Jon mention that it was very timely because he and Kate” just needed a break from each other”.
There are so many issues here, and I fear that if I were to delve into them I would come across as judgmental, harsh, or even a naysayer that hopes for the continued plunge of this family. Please hear me out on this, this is in no way the case. I pray for this family and can surly say that I could easily be in their shoes. My wife and I have challenges just like they do, I realize that I have sinned and will struggle with sin and that if I don’t allow God and others in my life to hold me to account then this could be me and my family.
That being said I will address one point and be done. When does “for the kids” become a way to justify their sin? Seriously? When did this become out and out selfishness? I tend to think that if Jon was on the beach that day loving his wife and family well… that would be for the kids. If Jon was with Kate helping set up the tent…that would be “for the kids”. Where did this thing go wrong? The children are longing for their mommy and daddy to be together, but somehow that is all too complicated to explain and so for the kid’s sake they divorce.
More than all those things, somehow they have rejected God. I have learned as a pastor to reconcile a marriage or reconcile a family that there must first be reconciliation to God. My prayer for Jon and Kate is not ultimately for the reconciliation of their family or marriage, although that is certainly part of it, but it is first for their reconciliation to God. This is done by the blood bought peace that Jesus purchased for us on the Cross. It was gruesome because or sin in gruesome, it was horrific because our sin is horrific. But it was beautiful because God’s love is beautiful, and the beauty of the Cross is that we can be reconciled to God, and that because of that we can be reconciled to one another.
I am convinced that apart from this hope of reconciliation to God, they (or any of us for that matter) will try to make this thing work on their own. And they will use “for the kid’s” to justify their actions, when the reality is that if they were really doing this for the kid’s they would be doing this for God.
Colosians 1.19-20
“For in him all the fullness of God was pleased to dwell, and through him to reconcile to himself all things, whether on earth or in heaven, making peace by the blood of his cross.”
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